Thursday, August 23, 2012

I Haven't Been Here In A While

So, some have you have been asking, "Peajaye, why haven't you posted in such a while? What's going on? Is everything all right?"

Okay, so no one's been asking me that. But still.

You see, I was called to Jury Duty back in July, and it was not a pleasant experience. For three weeks. None of it was fun. The case was not interesting. The lawyers were not engaging. The other jurors were not charming or kooky or good souls, as they had been in the 1990's, when I did two tours of duty. There was no sense of civic pride in any of it. It was like being on the set of Big Brother or Survivor, but without the hope of a big cash prize or short-lived celebrity.

Still, I was set to relive the terror for you in a series of scathing and hilarious essays, but then I got too tired. A big WHY suddenly hung over my head. I mean, just going into the mundane details in my mind made me exhausted, so I just decided against it.

And then, of course, the downward spiral began.

Why write? Why blog? Why draw? Why try to connect with the online world? Why, why, why? I felt like a three year old. Except with bills to pay and other assorted grown-up responsibilities.

I read something in the Steve Jobs bio about saying No to more things in your life in order to get rid of the clutter and to make room for the things that matter. I think I'm trying to figure out those things right now. It's a lovely luxury, I know. But still, cleaning up has never been one of my Favorite Things.